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paalam mi amor... sa ngayon hahanapin ko muna ang sarili ko at ikaw... maging masaya ka sa liga na gusto mo. gusto ko pag nagkita ulit tayo ay di na ako ganito.

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sa ilang taon nating magkasama ang daming nangyari... siguro sa tagal natin isa lang ang maaalala ko... sa la union... parang ginawang synopsis ang relasyon natin... ang ending komedy...

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Was invited to a costume party at Hardrock this Friday. But with the trip to La Union this weekend, I might have to pass on this one.

My itinerary this weekend:

Saturday – Corina’s debut.
Sunday/Monday – La union
Tuesday – Bagiuo (hopefully)

This is a bit childish but I worry that Dad might come over sa house and we’ll not be there because we are all in the province. Ang weird ko noh? But really, what if?

It took me thirty minutes of waiting for the jeepney to fill up. While waiting I have read half of Dan Brown’s Angels and Demons. I got so engrossed with the book and the loud banterings of two gays beside me that my eyes stayed wide open the whole trip. When I finally got home I found my letters unceremoniously opened, shoes and shirts borrowed without permission, my frustrations with v and my sister’s email swirling in my head. It eventually got me overboard. I glared at my mom when she walked into my room, probably to say hi. She asked me what’s wrong and I didn’t answer. The thought of discussing what she has been telling my sister would be pointless.

I vented out my anger on the person I cared for the most.

I’m angry, I’m tired and I find myself missing the person I shunned out of my life.

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I’m taking a few steps back in this relationship.

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danger…

he’s adorable

smells good

nice body

knows how to compliment a girl

a fucking flirt

big time player

rumored of having an affair with a married woman

and an officemate

must stay away from him... must not succumb...

Tired

was at brc yesterday. though i spent most of the trip sleeping it still felt like all my energy was drained out of my system. the day was cloudy but it was humid, dusty, hot and a heady smell of burned tires and leather lingered the air.

met an interesting lady who (i was surprised)was behind the Dare Devil pipes. watched ford and honda car race, ducati race and V's race. with each sharp curve he take my heart skipped. i looked away fearing he'll skid and crash.

i couldn't say i enjoyed my day, it was a so-so thing. honestly? it was not my scene lang.

u: i changed and i know i cant bare myself anymore to you.. i always find myself vulnerable and weak and over stuffed with emotions. A lot of realizations swept over me these past few weeks; things that I never bothered to listen to for the past 6 years. Ive come to realize that as much as I want you for myself, no matter what I do, there will never come a time that you'll look at me the same way I do to you. I saw it, felt it, and took it all in on your birthday. It was a landslide of truths, and truth behind truths. Too bad you'll never feel the same way for me.. i have so much to show you and I have so much to offer. Anyway.. thats why Im keeping my distance now. Things would change and sooner or later and eventually you'll forget that I was ever there.

I am feeling fractured, fragmented, repetitious, confused, and oh-so postmodern. Each work, each personal issue, each errand demands my full attention, and the best I can do is devote little bits of mind in their entirety to each cause. I cannot, therefore, pull myself together enough to even write this entry. There is just not enough unoccupied brain in me.

All in all, the perfect excuse for not blogging.

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My hiatus in blogging is taking on a new record. Somehow I didn’t feel the urgency to pour my thoughts on blogging. I’m like this when there’s too much good things happening. I’m happy and I'm loved… and I’m not whining anymore.

Still hasn’t started learning Spanish, though. Dami work. But then that has always been my excuse. Can you teach me na lang? :)